Wednesday, October 19, 2011
A Comparison...
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* 9 other NFL Championship rings not shown. An encore post from Feb2010 that has been updated to include the Packers SBXLV win. Vikings SB win still pending... |
Why Did The Vikings Player...
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Q: Why did the Vikings Player steal a police car? A: He saw "911" on the side and thought it was a Porsche. Q: What is the difference between a Vikings Fan and a baby? A: The baby will stop whining after awhile. Q: What's the difference between a porcupine and some Viking Fans in the Metrodome? A: The pricks are on the outside of a porcupine. Q: How do you save a drowning Vikings Fan? A: Take your foot off his head. __________________________________________ |
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A Vikings Player walks into his bedroom with a sheep under his arm and says... "Darling, this is the pig I have sex with when you have headaches." His wife is lying in bed and replies... "I think you'll find that's a sheep, you idiot." The Vikings Player says... "I think you'll find that I wasn't talking to you." |
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Monday, May 16, 2011
duh Bears SB-XLV Commemorative DVD...
One, day a man goes to the Chicago Bears ticket office and inquires about purchasing the Super Bowl XLV Commemorative DVD. The ticket teller replies that there isn't any Commemorative DVD for sale because the Bears did not make it to Super Bowl XLV. The following day the same man goes to the Chicago Bears ticket office and inquires about purchasing the Super Bowl XLV Commemorative DVD. The ticket teller politely replies to the man that there isn't any Super Bowl Commemorative DVD for sale because the Chicago Bears did not make it to Super Bowl XLV. This goes on for an entire week. The same man goes to the Bears ticket office inquiring about Super Bowl XLV Commemorative DVD's and the same teller says that none are for sale because the Bears did not make it to Super Bowl XLV. Another week of this goes by and the same man is still asking the same ticket teller about the Super Bowl XLV Commemorative DVD. Finally the ticket teller in a loud voice says, "I'VE TOLD YOU FOR THE LAST 2 WEEKS THERE IS NOT ANY SUPER BOWL XLV COMMEMORATIVE DVD'S AVAILABLE BECAUSE THE CHICAGO BEARS DID NOT MAKE IT TO SUPER BOWL XLV." The man replied, "I know. I drive all the way down from Green Bay just to hear you say that!" *** This is a slightly modified encore post from January 2008 and was retrieved from a forum post by Packfan4 over at Packers News Talk Football forums. |
Saturday, February 12, 2011
The Reason Why...
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The Chicago Bears' head coach, Lovie Smith, clearly upset about duh Bears' recent losses to the Green Bay Packers, decides to find out from Mike McCarthy what his secret is. So Lovie travels up to a Packers practice and asks McCarthy, "Coach, how is it that your team is so good? What's your secret?" Coach McCarthy responds by calling Aaron Rodgers over. "A-Rod, who's your father's brother's nephew?" Rodgers answers, "Why, Coach, that's easy. It's me." 
McCarthy turns to Lovie and says, "That's the secret. A smart
quarterback. You've got to have a smart quarterback." Thinking he's finally got all the tools he needs, Lovie returns to Chicago and the Bears' practice. He promptly calls over Jay Cutler. "Cutler! Who's your father's brother's nephew?" Jay looks perplexed, thinks a minute and says, "Coach, can I get back to you after practice on that one?" Smith says, "OK." During practice, Cutler calls over Devin Hester. "Devin, coach just asked me the weirdest question. Who's your father's brother's nephew?" Hester replies, "Duh! That's easy! It's me!" After practice, Cutler catches up with Lovie. "Coach! I think I've got it. My father's brother's nephew is Devin Hester!" Lovie yells, "No, no, NO, you idiot! It's Aaron Rodgers!" And that's one of the reason's why the Bears Still Suck! *** Thanks to Fat Oak for forwarding in this joke email... more can be found on our Joke Archive Page 3 - Go Pack Go! *** |
Thursday, February 03, 2011
I Don't Always Quit...
I Don't Always Quit On My Team...
But When I Do, I Prefer That It's In The NFC Championshiop Game (against the Packers). |
Friday, October 15, 2010
Thursday, August 12, 2010
And God Created Wisconsin...
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God was missing for six days. Eventually, Michael, the archangel, found him resting on the seventh day. He inquired, "Where have you been?"  God smiled deeply and proudly pointed
downwards through the clouds, "Look Michael. Look what I've made."Archangel Michael looked puzzled, and said, "What is it?" "It's a planet," replied God, and I've put life on it. I'm going to call it Earth and it's going to be a place to test Balance." "Balance?" inquired Michael, "I'm still confused." God explained, pointing to different parts of Earth. "For example, northern Europe will be a place of great opportunity and wealth, while southern Europe is going to be poor. Over here I've placed a continent of white people, and over there is a continent of black people. Balance in all things." God continued pointing to different countries. "This one will be extremely hot, while this one will be very cold and covered in ice." The Archangel, impressed by God's work, then pointed to a land area and said, "What's that one?" "That's Wisconsin, the most glorious place on earth. There are beautiful rivers and streams, lakes, forests, and hills. The people from Wisconsin are going to be handsome, modest, intelligent, and humorous, and they are going to travel the world. They will be extremely sociable, hardworking, high achieving, carriers of peace, and producers of good things. Champions shall come from here!" Michael gasped in wonder and admiration, but then asked, "But what about balance, God? You said there would be balance." God smiled, "I will create Minnesota, wait till you see the clowns I put there. They will field a football team to provide entertainment, will wear purple and play in a domed stadium." Michael inquisitively asked, "Why a domed stadium?" God chuckled and said, "You see Michael... even I don't want to watch them play football." **** Thanks to #66 Chica for sending this one in to us... |
Sunday, August 01, 2010
One Wish...
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I met a fairy today who granted me one wish. "I want to live forever" I said. "Sorry" said the fairy, "I'm not allowed to grant wishes like that!" "Fine" I said, "I want to die when the Vikings win the Superbowl!" "You crafty bastard," said the fairy. *** Thanks to Packer Paul for sending this in *** |
Tuesday, June 22, 2010
How The Fight Started...
One year, I decided to buy my mother-in-law a cemetery plot as a Christmas gift. The next year, I didn't buy her a gift. When she asked me why, I replied, "Well, you still haven't used the gift I bought you last year!" And that's how the fight started... _______________________________________ I asked my wife, 'Where do you want to go for our anniversary?' It warmed my heart to see her face melt in sweet appreciation. 'Somewhere I haven't been in a long time!' she said. So I suggested, 'How about the kitchen?' And that's when the fight started... _______________________________________ I rear-ended a car this morning.. So, there we were alongside the road and slowly the other driver got out of his car. You know how sometimes you just get soooo stressed and little things just seem funny? Yeah, well I couldn't believe it.. he was a DWARF!!! He stormed over to my car, looked up at me, and shouted, 'I AM NOT HAPPY!' So, I looked down at him and said, 'Well, then which one are you?' And then the fight started... _______________________________________ My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming anniversary. She said, 'I want something shiny that goes from 0 to 200 in about 3 seconds.' I bought her a scale. And then the fight started... _______________________________________ When I got home last night, my wife demanded that I take her someplace Expensive. So, I took her to a gas station. And then the fight started... _______________________________________ My wife sat down on the couch next to me as I was flipping the channels. She asked, 'What's on TV?' I said, 'Dust.' And then the fight started... |
I took my wife to a restaurant. The waiter, for some reason, took my order first.. 'I'll have the strip steak, medium rare, please.' He said, 'Aren't you worried about the mad cow?' 'Nah, she can order for herself.' And that's when the fight started... _______________________________________ I tried to talk my wife into buying a case of Miller Light for $14.95. Instead, she bought a jar of cold cream for $7.95. I told her the beer would make her look better at night than the cold cream. And that's when the fight started... _______________________________________ My wife and I were sitting at a table at her high school reunion, and she kept staring at a drunken man swigging his drink as he sat alone at a nearby table. I asked her , 'Do you know him?' 'Yes,' she sighed, ' He's my old boyfriend... I understand he took to drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear he hasn't been sober since.' I said, 'who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?' And then the fight started... _______________________________________ My wife and I were watching Who Wants To Be A Millionaire while we were in bed. I turned to her and said, 'Do you want to have sex?' 'No,' she answered. I then said, 'Is that your final answer?' She didn't even look at me this time, simply saying 'Yes.' So I said, 'Then I'd like to phone a friend.' And that's when the fight started... _______________________________________ My wife asked me if a certain dress made her butt look big. I told her Not as much as the dress that she had worn yesterday. And then the fight started..... _______________________________________ When our lawn mower broke and wouldn't run, my wife kept hinting to me that I should get it fixed. But, somehow I always had something else to take care of first, the truck, the car, playing golf ' Always something more important to me. Finally she thought of a clever way to make her point. When I arrived home one day, I found her seated in the tall grass, busily snipping away with a tiny pair of sewing scissors. I watched silently for a short time and then went into the house. I was gone only a minute, and when I came out again I handed her a toothbrush. I said, 'When you finish cutting the grass, you might as well sweep the driveway.' And then the fight started... The doctors say I will walk again, but I will always have a limp. |
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*** Thanks to Packer Paul for forwarding in the above How The Fight Started... and thanks to those who thought it up. BK |
Wednesday, June 16, 2010
Because I Love Brett Favre...
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Still... after all this time. I keep thinking about him every day... I love (to make fun of) Brett Favre. ...from http://www.dailycomedy.com/hottopic/Brett_Favre
...from http://qufnfl.wordpress.com/brett-favre-jokes/
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Friday, May 28, 2010
Friday, April 30, 2010
Tuesday, April 27, 2010
A Word From A Competitor...
That would be the Dos Equi's Cerveza Lifestyle, a direct competitor to Packer Palace's Blitz Beer Lifestyle. Oh, and alleged QB of duh Bears Jay Cutler has something to add... "I don't always throw interceptions. But when I do, I prefer to throw them in the redzone." *** Thanks to the unknown creator(s) of the image above that was originally found in some random football forum, and now presented to you for amusement. *** |
Friday, April 16, 2010
Friday, April 09, 2010
Friday, April 02, 2010
Friday Football Funnies...
McHumor |
Stayskal |
McHumor |
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Almost every joke we've collected and/or
modified since 2004 can be found in the Packer Palace Joke Archives
on Page 1 or Page
2 - BK |
Friday, March 26, 2010
